Have you wondered no matter how much effort or time in relationships it ends in break up and heart break? Do you feel no matter what you do you partner always has something to complain about? Is relationship too tiring and draining for you?
The love language was introduced by Dr. Chapman. Love language is the way a person prefers to express love to their partner and receive it from their partner. Many might wonder what is wrong with such an expectation in a relationship. There are different love languages, and everyone has their own love language. When an individual is in a relationship, both try to express their love in their own way and expect the same. Learning your partner’s love language can make the relationship more meaningful and effective.
Initially, in the relationship, we make all the efforts to please each other, but gradually it becomes monotonous. The need to feel love is a primary human emotional need. For love, we do things we don’t prefer or desire doing, and as the days go on, we forget or become busy with our own lives. We need to understand that to sustain and keep the love in a relationship, we need to work hard and keep learning about each other to express and keep the love going.
Identify your love language.
There is a standard quiz that you can take to learn your love language or reflect on what makes you happy when other do for you. Once you know your love language, communicate it to your partner and know your partner’s love language so both can effectively speak the each others love language and make the relationship healthier and more meaningful.
The five love languages
Acts of service
If acts of service you like when your partner engages in services and makes it easier for you, For example, cooking lunch for you or doing laundry. For you, actions speak louder than words. Doing small or big services makes you feel loved and valued.
Gifts
Giving a gift is valued and makes the person feel loved. They prefer the visual symbol of love. It is not about an expensive gift; it is all about the thought, effort, and choice of the gift to represent love and relationship.
Quality time
Spending time is a precious commodity that deserves full attention. There are different demands in all areas of our lives. If your partner’s love language is quality time, your partner simply wants to spend time with you. Actively listen to them and maintain eye contact. It means a lot to them when they are given undivided attention. For example, going for a walk together or spending an hour a day talking about each other.
Words of affirmation
People who use affirmation as their love language value verbal acknowledgment. The verbal compliments or words of appreciation are expressed in a simple, straightforward way. For example, I really like how you are always on time to pick me up at work.
Physical touch
Physical touch is affirming and makes the individual feel emotionally connected. People with physical touch love language like holding hands or hugging it makes them feel valued and loved.
The perks of receiving and expressing love language
- It enhances selflessness in relationship
- Being empathetic
- Helps the couple to maintain their intimacy
- Improves the communication
- Contentment with relationship
- Enhances the understanding between couples
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