Depression is a mood disorder that is characterized by a persistent feeling of helplessness, hopelessness, and worthlessness. The person is often stuck in this triad (of helplessness, hopelessness, and worthlessness). Depression affects a person’s ability to manage their personal and professional lives. Here are some true statements said by people who live with depression.
- I don’t know why I exist nobody cares.
- I think God made a mistake by creating me.
- I am good for nothing.
- I feel like I am stuck in a pitch-dark hole with no way out.
- Everyone says there is a bright light at the end of the tunnel, but I think some of us are lost in the tunnel.
- Life is not beautiful. It is ugly; everything is ugly.
- I feel choked every night, staring at the ceiling and thinking about my pathetic life.
- Death is more peaceful than living this crazy life.
These thoughts are less likely to be encountered by someone who experiences the emotion of sadness. It is essential for us to understand why such thoughts are encountered by an individual with depression. Some of the major causes of depression are upsetting or stressful life events and traumatic abusive experiences in life, which are non-clinical causes of depression. Some research studies have suggested that people who live in difficult social and economic circumstances are likely to be depressed and question the existence of their lives.
Lawrence J. Crabb, Jr., an American Christian counselor, talks about three personal needs in his book, Effective Biblical Counseling, and what we people do to fulfill those needs. The needs are to feel secure, significant, and worthy. We are motivated to feel secure, worthy, and significant and spend more time and energy to meet and satisfy our needs. When we fail to meet these needs, we build certain beliefs, like “If only I had more money.” “If only I had a loving family.” “If I was never criticized,” “If only I had more friends.” the list goes on and on. Humans get agitated when their needs are not met, and when the goals they have set for themselves to fulfill become unattainable, they feel guilty, resentful, blame their external circumstances, and fear failure. These can lead to psychological disorders like depression. In such situations, it is essential for us to step out and confide in someone who understands, and it is also essential to rationally think about what we have associated with the three needs.
Here is the story of a person who suffered from depression for a long time. In the counseling, it was revealed that she longed to feel safe and secure. She often opened up to people, thinking they would care and make her feel secure. She often told herself, “If I had a boyfriend, I would be secure.” “If I had more friends, I would be valued and safe; they would take care of me.” However, every step she took in relationships and friendship ended in failure, making her feel unloved and insecure. This led her to isolate herself and feel worthless about her life, which debilitated her social and personal life. The counselor gave her a reality check and helped her to challenge the distorted thinking that she developed in failed relationships. She realized she can’t often lean on others to feel secure and place higher expectations on them for her happiness. She took the responsibility to take care of herself and not place it on others. Later, she found her source of security in Christ and overcame depression.
Here to help
If you think you are being bothered by any of these or any other mental health issues, Ananth Jeevan is here to help. Here’s how you can avail our services:
- If you want to talk to someone, there is a helpline you can contact at +918645687456. We are here to listen.
- You can check your mental health status via our AJ App by downloading it from Android Playstore
- If you want to chat anonymously, you can check out the feature in our app.
- If you want Counselling, you can ask for appointments from our WhatsApp number +917661951444